Once Upon a Cold Gray Winter Day...

This is the Sound of Settling

[Above: Cross-stitch I made over the last three days. The following is a written record of the account as it came to me.]

The fireplace casts shadows on the ceiling; the reflections resemble a children's flip-book and at times it seems if it stops the world might well stop along with it.

***

3 stations emerge through the static- 2 of them being country. At this stage a local mix station that I had never given any thought to appears to be my best bet. It's playing a so-so 80's song that could almost pass as a cheap rip-off of Duran Duran. But I'm not complaining, seeing that I'm not cool enough to own an ipod or even a measly MP3 player. Instead I'm forced to drag out my last resort to civilization out of the back of my (at this point cave-like) closet: a portable CD player from the dreaded manufactured date of...2001!!!!!!!! I have limited myself to 1 or 2 cds a day, so that I don't use up all my batteries at once yet don't go entirely loony.

...That is I don't complain until the station plays a terrible rap song older than my CD player followed by Ricky Martin (a name I hadn't heard for ages and with good reason!) That being the last straw I turn off the little radio who's antenna had been ripped off long before and leave it setting all alone crookedly on the windowsill as I walk out of the kitchen into my own solitude.

***

Outside is destruction. The trees lay in ruin (for the most part anyway, and the pines never stood a chance, pardon my pun). Yet I've never seen something so awful look so beautiful. Everything is covered in snow and ice, so white and pure. The trees look as though they're made of glass. And even the ones that bow and break under the weight look eager to go.

***

In my hours of seclusion I've become someone 5 times my age, reading and cross-stitching for the most part. It's now day 3 and everything is becoming routine, almost automatic. Perhaps this proves I would've made it through during the Ice Age or even the Dark Ages (spare the plague haha). Actually I find it rather cozy; the shadows seem like home. I almost don't want it to end in some aspects aside from heat and water. But every hour I also find myself longing to watch a different movie and remembering my all time low brought out of obsession and desperation; as I attempt to listen (not watch, simply listen) to LOST on a 3 by 3 inch battery powered screen attached to the worst black and white TV in existence. As hinted at already the picture was nowhere to be found, or perhaps I should say located, no matter where I pointed the antenna, and the sound quality wasn't far behind. I joked with my family that the first thing I would hear would be *static* Sayid?! *static*. And ironically it was! haha

***

However, this experience (and believe me even 3 days without electric is indeed an experience with my family!) has made me take a step back and realize even though I think of myself as a child of nature, how much I still take for granted. And also how pathetic and dependent our species really is after realizing not being on facebook for 3 days was the longest I'd went without it since acquiring one! Sometimes a smack in the face is what we all need to bring us back down from our superiority and division of social classes and the likes.

***

I'll admit that I enjoy myself better when there are the splendors of civilization and technology to turn to, yet somewhere in the depths of darkness lay inspiration and creativity.

***

Sleep comes easier than I imagined, (and that's really saying something coming from an insomniac!) and overall I don't really have any complaints.....

....And just like that, as if it were never off, the power returned.

Balaclava and 12 Other Things I Won't Make Today

So here I am, listening to Duran Duran at two in the afternoon. Today is yet another snow day and while I find myself enjoying this far more than school I am endlessly bored. Also I feel the need to actually write while blowing off homework at the same time. I know it doesn't make sense, but neither do I! Overall I think snow days are meant to be drab and pointless anyway. There is little excitement to them and only two reasons they matter: when you find out the night before and can stay up longer or when it's getting close to the time to get up at about six in the morning when the world is still dead and you find out that you may also remain barely alluded to the world for a few more hours as well. Before the sun starts shooting slits of light between the blinds, blinding you instead. When you are too groggy to really grasp what's going on just grateful it is. That's when the snow day matters, not when you actually wake up around ten and realize that the day is half gone already, there is too much snow to leave the house, nothing on tv, and only about five of your "friends" on facebook. haha I can never seem to actually accomplish anything on a snow day either. I always set myself up, give myself a pep talk, and then.......plop myself down in a chair. Like for example right now! Every idea I get is a result of laziness. I could watch a movie, read a book, perhaps cut up some magazines in search of interesting pictures. These are all things I like to do but don't require much skill and little to no physical activity. During times like this making my bed is a huge accomplishment! The thinking process is dead. Nothing clever came to me as I ate my cereal while watching a cooking show, and I can hardly answer when my father asks it I want a grilled cheese. I have become as pointless as the day I'm stuck in, yet I wish for another tomorrow. The way things are looking we might have one giant snow day taking up the rest of the week, what then shall be left when I go back? My brain shall be a mixture of mush and song lyrics..............as it is already I suppose. I find myself wondering how the others are coping and if they are more productive than I. I suppose it doesn't matter if they are, just a thought. Why should I do anything worth while with my time when time isn't even worth while. Kurt Vonnegut said, "What is time? It is a serpent which eats its tail." So I suppose I shall get it back, perhaps tomorrow, and I shall try again then.

Dawn of the Dead

This is a picture I recently took, after hours of bordom and a sudden strike of creativity. And yes, these are items I have randomly scattered throughout my room......a couple scarfs, a ceramic hand, and a spider ring, you know the ususal! haha

Within His Bending Sickle's Compass Come